Yearly Kos is an Opportunity...

... an opportunity for all of us ..."B-Arkers" to make the recommended list!

What is a "B-Arker" You Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy readers know what I mean:

B-Arker -

The useless third of the population (consisting of hairdressers, tired TV producers, insurance salesmen, personnel officers, security guards, management consultants, telephone sanitizers and the like) were packed into the B-Ark, one of three giant Ark spaceships, and told that everyone else would follow shortly in the other two. The other two thirds of the population, of course, did not follow and "led full, rich and happy lives until they were all suddenly wiped out by a virulent disease contracted from unsanitary telephones.

Unfortunately (for you) there is more...

Yup, I figure with all the goings on in Las Vegas, those of us who are used to DailyKos obscurity might actually get read. With the exception of the occasional live-blog from the floor of the conference, we low-as-dirt, mediocre "B-Arker" writers with uncool handles will not have to compete with the gifted A and C-Arkers. We might actually make the recommended list. Am I being overly optimistic? Hardly.

Going with the Third-Best is an American tradition. Just look at our presidential Election process. It is designed to pick the third best. Don't believe me, just look at 2004's results.

The best came out strong. He built incredible net-roots support, raised lots of money, pissed off the inside-the-belt democrats, then he made a funny (funny strange, not funny ha-ha) scream at a hockey game. That was it. He had to go. The media piled on. Then the media piled on the media. That left an opening for the second best.

The second best, after a rough start, got his act together. Some key firings, and next thing you know, he was the front-runner. But as could have been expected, second best went wind surfing. Third best had a field day making second best look like a go-whichever-way-the-wind-blows flip-flopper.

Once again, the media piled on and things looked bad for number two. But the media attacks were not enough. Third best used his buddies to help. A Secretary-of-State here, a voting machine maker there, and before you knew it, third best was "elected" president.

Is he really third best? If you believe the statistics he is. Anybody with a mind as sharp as our third-best candidate can see that a 30% approval rating is almost one third, and one-third is just like third best. Isn't it?

America, we know how to elect the third best candidate.


DailyKos readers are similar. We carefully read the diaries of the day and recommend the best. Naturally, if our best writers are not available, then we move on the second best. If our second best writers are hanging out at Yearly Kos too then that leaves the "floor" to the third best. There will be no choice. Since dKos readers have to recommend something third best will get the nod. It is the American way.

If you are Fourth Best, do not worry, next year will be your chance to shine. Yearly Kos will grow so huge, that First, Second, and Third best will go to the conference leaving the floor to you.

For this years first and second best writers roaming the floor of Yearly Kos I give you just one piece of advice. Since we third best diarists will be home composing our magnum, one-liter, or half-bottle opuses (or is that opi), we will not be doing our regular jobs, so I would suggest you avoid using the telephones you never know what disease you might catch.

Cross posted at A Rational Being

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